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THE DETAILS....

Ever get a song stuck in your head? I've had 'Don't go breaking my heart" stuck in my brain for about three weeks now.  I'm sure you've heard it, it's a cute little ditty between Elton John and Kiki Dee, 70's lite.  It also happens to be my karaoke 'go to' song, not that I have ever done karaoke, but if I did I am sure I could belt this out without a hitch.  I finally downloaded it on Itunes because I needed to hear it, in the hope that once I did it would be knocked out of it's resting place in my cerebrum, but alas no--It has made it worse.... 

I asked my Fancy if he wouldn't consider this for our "song" for our upcoming nupitals.  I thought it might be funny for us to do a duet, he's incredible at impersonations and could pull off a flawless Elton OR Kiki.  He's usually up for my hair brain ideas but he nixed this.  Sheesh, I so don't want my future mother in-law planned wedding to be b-o-r-i-n-g...I do have a secret to share with you though.  I do have the song I am going to walk down the aisle to....Well, it was a toss up I thought it would be really amusing to have the Rolling Stones 'Wild Horses'--"Wild horses couldn't keep me away..." But alas, I decided to embrace the bane of my existence.  My first name is Tristan, my middle name is Shout, put it together you have (drum roll..)Yes--Tristan Shout, get it?  'Twist and Shout', you see my mum has the same cheeky sense of humour as I inherited. So instead of fighting it I am going to  go for it make her proud.  There's a reggae version that I am particularly fond of...

Do you want to know how far my future m.i.l. has gotten with our wedding?  Well, thankfully teal is out since she's not sure if she will be fitting into her teal dress by September, phew!  They have hired a jazz quartet that my future father in-law saw at some event.  He liked them and asked them if they would play at our wedding, they liked ol' Howard and said, why not?  The future in-laws don't like cake so we won't have cake.  Fine by me, I don't like cake either, my Fancy likes anything with sugar in it so he's easy.  I don't mind cheesecake, so I made a suggestion and they have been on a tasting frenzy.  My Fancy was adamant that this be a non-religious affair, no churches, temples . mosques, etc.  The F.I.L's have obliged by renting the courtyard outside the synagouge.  "It's so lovely and modern...", says my future m.i.l. 

I have not designed the invites yet, I am awaiting their feedback, lol... This is so not how I imagined my big day, but to tell you the truth I didn't really imagine it.  Maybe all those people are right you have to 'visualize' what you want and it 'poof' comes into fruition.  I mean we will do one thing I imagined, we are doing to San Francisco City Hall to get the marriage license and make it 'legal'.  I have always loved this building since I was a kid and knew I would get married there, but I didn't really think beyond that.  The building is sooooo Miss B.:

It's classic, it's clean, it has beautiful light and history. I am excited about this, because it will be our special day, just me and my Fancy...

WHAT'S THE BIG TEAL?

I grew up in an odd household filled with contradictions and old world torture, ahem-values.  I wasn't allowed to wear makeup until the day I moved out of the house.  It didn't stop me from pining for it.  I remember being 13 years old and going  into our pharmacy/cosmetic mecca.  I asked the pharmacist/makeup artist behind the Lancome counter (it was a pretty swank neighborhood).

ME:  "Excuse me Mame, um, if I were to buy some eyeshadow, to uh wear, what would you suggest?"

She looked at my little doe like self, all big brown eyes and all and without missing a beat said:

"Teal."

Thus, began my career as an underage hooker. I jest... Teal eyeshadow on a brown eyed girl isn't exactly inconspicuous and I of course was caught by the mom mafia immediately.  Teal still leaves a tart taste in my mouth,
I haven't had an affinity for teal since that day.

What does this have to do with my upcoming nuptials?  Well, My soon to be mother-in-law is planning a soiree, NOT a wedding--a party (me and the fancy have been adamant about NO wedding).  It's a very kind and generous gesture, but I soon found out that we would have no say in our wedding party.  She came in from out of town and I showed her some invites in my fave Tiffany Blue. She said she wanted to match the invites to her dress (of course, isn't that how we all do it?) a bluish-green.  Great I am thinking, aqua, Robin's egg blue but NO-- out of no where she points to a color that made me recoil.  "There, like this, teal!".  OY!  I can't go through with a teal wedding, I might as well wear white pumps and tease my bangs.  I'll keep you updated on the debacle which is my life...

***On an even worse side note my first love married a girl (that was bad enough, didn't he know the law about staying single forever after I dated him whether I wanted him or not?  Sheesh!)  Anyway, he married a girl named (drum rll)--Teal!!!!